Self compassion and Self-Esteem

Self compassion

Instead of mercilessly judging and criticizing yourself for various inadequacies or shortcomings, self-compassion means you are kind and understanding when confronted with personal failings. Self-compassion entails being warm and understanding toward ourselves rather than ignoring our pain or criticising ourselves. 

When we cannot always be or get exactly what we want, our reality is denied or fought against and our suffering increases in the form of stress, frustration, and self-criticism. When this reality is accepted with sympathy and kindness, greater emotional balance is experienced. 

Self-compassion also requires taking a balanced approach to our negative emotions so that feelings are neither suppressed nor exaggerated. This stems from the process of relating personal experiences to those of others who are also suffering, thus putting our own situation into a larger perspective. 

Self-esteem 

Self-esteem relates to self-evaluation of competence and the assessment of one's qualities in many areas including physical appearance, academic functioning, autonomy, and interpersonal relationships. An individual's perception of self-worth develops gradually and relates to one's achievements, positive outlook, and interactions with others. It is influenced by developmental factors, family dynamics, school and community supports. 

Past experiences are often linked to an individual's sense of belonging and security and tend to impact on one's activities, opinions, and decisions. Negative views of the self often result in a tendency to exaggerate negative aspects of daily events and may lead to dependency on others or result in stress reactions. 

We can improve our self-esteem in the following ways: 

• Practising self-care

• Accepting compliments

• Affirming our real worth

• Embracing our failures

• Using positive self-affirmations/statements

• Identifying our competencies and developing them

• Introducing self-compassion and removing self-criticism

If you find you need extra support working through these concepts, please feel free to contact us on 8838-8687 or book an appointment online and come in to see one of our friendly Psychologists.