Abortions – supporting someone through it

People choose to have abortions for a number of reasons, and everyone responds and experiences it in a different way. Supporting someone through an abortion can seem daunting and tricky to navigate. If you know someone going through the process it is important you are there to support them and help them through it. Below are some tips and strategies that might help you out. 

Be present: 

Don’t stress over what to say or how to say it. Being there and present with the person can be worth a million words. Sit with them, watch movies with them, listen to them, bring them snacks, dinner or coffee. If you can’t physically be there giving them a call or shooting them a supportive text message can mean a lot. Offer them unconditional support without pressuring them, sometimes time alone is needed. 

Be non-judgmental: 

This is not the time to offer your opinion or belief on the matter. Listen to them, try to really understand and validate their experience. Let them go through the pros and cons list themselves, they will know which decision is best for their situation.  Hold back any biases or judgements you may hold on the topic, let them know you’ll be there to support them no matter the outcome. If they are grappling with the decision offer an ear to listen, a shoulder to cry, and reassure them that they know what’s best for themselves.

Be there to offer practical support: 

Termination of a pregnancy is a medical procedure that may require visits to various clinics. Offer to take them to their appointments. Do not pressure them into accepting the support, but let them know you’re there for whatever they may need. Offer to do some research and connect them into outside supports if they want/need. Cook them up a few meals they can chuck in their freezer, help take every day stressors off their mind and run a few errands for them. 

Everyone is different, and will respond differently. Some people go back to “normal” life straight away while some people struggle with it for a while. Ask them what they need and want, offer to be a distraction, a taxi driver or someone to just sit with them. Overall be understanding and compassionate towards them. Lastly make sure to check in with them days, weeks and months afterwards. They might appear okay straight away but letting them know you’re still there if they need is important. 

If you’re concerned about your mental health or wanting extra support, feel free to contact us on 8838-8687 or book an appointment online and come in to see one of our friendly Psychologists.